Ever thought about turning your passion into a business that truly reflects who you are? Joan Nwosu, an inspiring dating coach, author, and speaker specializes in helping professional women over 40 rediscover love after divorce. Joan opens up about her own journey—from heartbreak to healing—and reveals how aligning your business with your core values can unlock incredible success. She dives into overcoming the fear of charging what you’re worth, how embracing self-love fueled the growth of her thriving business, and why understanding your own self-worth is essential for attracting the right relationships in both your personal and professional life.
🎧This conversation is full of hope, empowerment, and real-life insights that will inspire you to embrace your journey and build a life and business you love!
Key Takeaways from this Episode
- The essence of a heart-led business
- The journey from corporate to calling
- The pitfalls of quitting your day job too soon
- Marketing mishaps and lessons learned
- The unique challenges of online dating post-divorce
About the Guest
Joan Nwosu is an Elite Dating Coach, Author, and Speaker who helps professional women over 40 rediscover love after divorce. Through her 3M Magnetic Method, she empowers women to transform their mindset, attract high-caliber partners, and create lasting relationships. Joan combines personal experience with professional expertise to guide women in elevating their love lives to match their career success.
Additional Resources
- Website: www.joannwosu.com
- Email: joan@joannwosu.com
- Facebook: www.facebook.com/datingwithjoan
- Instagram: www.instagram.com/joan_nwosu/#
- X: https://x.com/joan_nwosu
- YouTube: www.youtube.com/joan_nwosu
- FREE 7-Day Dating Challenge: https://go.datingwithjoan.com/dating
- Books:
Amazon: iRise: The 10 Secrets to Getting Up When Life Knocks You Down
Free Copy: SECOND CHANCES AT LOVE: The Ultimate Blueprint to Mastering Dating in Your 40s After Divorce
Free Copy: Manifesting Miracles THE MAGIC MORNING RITUAL
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Explore the Dialogue’s Treasures: Unearth the insights within! Delve into the profound wisdom woven throughout our conversation.
Speaker: 0:01
Welcome to the Heart-Led Business Show, where compassion meets commerce and leaders lead with love. Join your host, Tom Jackobs, as he delves into the insightful conversations with visionary business leaders who defy the status quo, putting humanity first and profit second. From heartfelt strategies to inspiring stories, this podcast is your compass in the world of conscious capitalism. So buckle up and let’s go. Let your heart guide your business journey.
Tom Jackobs: 0:36
Today, we have Joan Nwosu, an elite dating coach, author and speaker, dedicated to helping professional women over 40, rediscover romance post divorce with her sparkling 3M magnetic method. Get ready to be inspired as she shares her journey. Joan, welcome to the show.
Joan Nwosu: 0:54
Thank you so much, Tom, such a pleasure to be here.
Tom Jackobs: 0:56
Excited to have this conversation and give listeners a backstory. We met at a mastermind event in Canada Ottawa in November, December it was cold, but, you know how some people, you just like instantly have that connection. That was Joan and I, so we had a great time and, just really connected. And thrilled to have her on the show. And I know you listeners are going to love this conversation. So Joan, the first question is what’s your definition of a heart led business?
Joan Nwosu: 1:27
Thanks, Tom. For me, It doesn’t get bigger than what I do. My business is about the heart about love. A heart led business, starts from there, right? So it’s not just, I want to make money. I want to jump on the next shiny object. It’s now I want to build something out of my purpose, out of my passion, something that can impact the lives of many people and just focusing more on impact as opposed to profits. Doesn’t mean that profits are not good, but, we’ll talk about that. Being your authentic self, creating a business that aligns with your values and really in line with the purpose that you want or mission that you want for your life.
Tom Jackobs: 2:01
Yeah, I hear that a lot from guests about alignment with your values, your authenticity it feels so much better than when it’s not in alignment. Have you been in those situations?
Joan Nwosu: 2:14
Tom, eight careers later, it took me over 40 years to realize that just pursuing things that are soul sucking is never gonna get you to that place where you feel fulfilled, you feel happy, and you feel like you’re making an impact. Yes, you might not make as much money, but doing something in alignment gives you a reason to get out of bed every day. You’re not waking up saying, Again, like somebody shoot me. Is it Friday yet? every day, you’re not doing the right thing. You’re not doing something that fires you up, that fills your cup, that lights you up and you feel like you’re actually making a difference. You’re just being paid for your time. So yes, I have been there many times. And yeah, so I’ll just say to anybody who’s questioning? If you don’t wake up excited about what it is that you do, then maybe that is a sign that you need to start thinking a little bit deeper. You don’t have to jump ship now, but start thinking about what is it that I can do that will really make me light up inside will make me feel like, Hey, I’m making a difference. I’m impacting lives, and it really aligns with the things that bring me joy.
Tom Jackobs: 3:11
And that’s great too. We were talking pre show about Instagram influencers that all talk about drop everything, go right in. And I think that is the worst advice in the whole world. When I made the transition out of corporate world to on, true entrepreneurship, like where I had no safety net. It took me a year of preparation to be ready to jump ship and put away the safety net of, a steady paycheck.
Joan Nwosu: 3:40
Absolutely. And I think that’s a big mistake. That’s a big fear a lot of people have. if you’re jumping from corporate, always been in corporate. I’ve left a few times because corporate and I don’t get along. having that safety net until you’re ready to jump ship completely is key when you’re worried about where’s my next dollar going to come from. How am I going to pay my bills? You’re not able to be in that creative space where you can give the best to your business and the people you want to serve. So it’s never a good idea. Even though I’ve done it. Pre COVID, 2019. I was like, I’m done. I went to one of those seminars and they’re like, send in your resignation letter right now. And they’re like, no, do
Tom Jackobs: 4:18
Oh my gosh.
Joan Nwosu: 4:19
We have to do it now. I got on my laptop and sent in my resignation letter. They did too. And so I sent in my resignation without having a full plan of how this new business that I’ve just discovered that I wanted to do was going to pan out. I knew nothing about sales and marketing, and we’re going to talk about that because that is a monster on its own, but I just went all in. They were like, get rid of the parachute, just jump. And so I jumped. two weeks later, I’m like, okay, what do I do now? The bills are showing up. So yes, even though I did have some savings, but you know how it goes within a couple of months. Savings were running out. I hadn’t figured out how to build a system around my business. I didn’t know shit about marketing. I didn’t know what I was doing. I didn’t know how to speak to my ideal clients. I wasn’t making sales. the pandemic hit and then it was the wild West. And it was just now everybody was online. Everyone, people who’d been doing this for a minute, we’re all there in everybody’s faces. And this was, I, this new entrepreneur trying to find a voice, trying to find a space for myself, wasn’t working. I had to run back to get a corporate job I will have this corporate job while I’m building my business. And that’s what I’ve done consistently over the last five years now. Whereas I’m building and growing my business. I have a job, even though I’ve quit a few jobs in between, but something that is bringing in some money that I can at least pay my bills so that I can focus and invest in my business.
Tom Jackobs: 5:38
Yeah,
Joan Nwosu: 5:39
Type\ resignation letter today.
Tom Jackobs: 5:40
Please, put the phone down.
Joan Nwosu: 5:42
Crazy.
Tom Jackobs: 5:43
Step away from the keyboard. Yeah. That is, that is wild. I’ve not heard that, but it doesn’t surprise me with these seminars I think they have good intentions but it’s irresponsible to tell people to quit their job when you don’t know, the entire what’s going on with that? Anyway. Tell us about your business and what inspired you to start a heart led business.
Joan Nwosu: 6:06
I’m a dating coach for Divorced Women. I got divorced in 2016. Prior to getting married, for me, dating was like, it was pretty simple. It was pretty straightforward. Back in the day, dating was simple. I got divorced and it was like, okay, so what happens now? Oh, you only meet people online. like, okay, so now it’s technology based. Okay. Let’s jump into that. Did I attract in every crazy person out there and their dog and cats. It took me a couple of years, one bad relationship after another to figure out that, okay, Joan, there’s a problem here. This is not working. The biggest moment for me was a second relationship after my divorce. I thought, okay, this is the one. I just said to myself, this is the one. then we were rushing everything. He was love bumming me. He was just doing it again. I didn’t know about all this online dating stuff. So I just thought, okay, it’s normal. He’s in love. Let’s just do it. And we started to make all this long term plans very quickly. Started trying to get pregnant, did get pregnant through IVF, 25,000 dollars. But no one’s calculating that money today. Did get pregnant and then we started having issues like this is like less than a year into the relationship. And one day he just we had a fight because he wanted some money and I said I don’t have that money to give and It was like, okay, I’m gonna I’m taking a walk. I thought it was just going for a walk, but he didn’t come back home. Anywho, three weeks later middle of the night something was wrong and I was like, okay, shit, I have to get myself to the hospital, got myself to the hospital cold winter. You can imagine in Toronto. And I was there just saying, okay, I know something is wrong. I feel like I’m having a miscarriage. I’m staying there in the hospital and I’m calling him. Call the first time. It’s ringing. No answer. Call the second time. He sends his voicemail and then I leave him this message saying, hey, I’m in the hospital. I think I’m having a miscarriage. Can you call a come over? This is the name of the hospital. I’m here by myself. I really need you right now. No answer. Did not call back. Did not respond. And that was the time that was the day I promised myself never again. This is not about them. This has to be about me. There has to be something that I’m not doing correctly. That is attracting these kinds of people. And so after that, I did have a miscarriage, which was very unfortunate. And I just decided, okay, I’m going to take some time out now and really go on a journey. I thought it was just a journey of learning how to date, but it was more a journey for myself, a journey of healing, of transformation, and really trying to find out who I am, to forgive myself, to love myself, to increase my self worth, my self worthiness, and really be clear on what it is I was looking for in a relationship. And so I started that journey, worked on it, figured out how to get amazing men and the rest is history because I went on to date amazing people and it just hit me. There’s so many women like me who, we’re now in our 40s. It’s been a while since we dated. The dating world is now completely different from what we’re used to. And so knowing how to show up as your true self, show up as the best version of yourself, being able to attract the kind of man that you want, being able to identify early on which ones are a waste of time and which ones could really lead to something potentially really good is really key. A lot of women who are divorced are usually broken. The self confidence is usually broken. They’re afraid they have all this. They have maybe assets, they have kids. So they’re a bit more fearful about putting themselves out there. So I try to bridge that gap and really help women thrive again, because you’ve been divorced because you’re 40, 50, 60, it doesn’t matter. You can still find love regardless of how old you are or whatever situation you’ve been through. So that’s my story.
Tom Jackobs: 9:41
Wow. That is absolutely wild. And so glad that you’ve come out on the other end. So much better off. And I think, thinking back to, friends of mine that are divorced and seeing the patterns repeat over and over again, it totally makes sense in terms of you’re used to what you’re used to. And, You keep attracting the same person and until you work on yourself and figure out why is it that I keep attracting this type of person that takes advantage of me or does whatever and figure that out then it just,
Joan Nwosu: 10:15
Becomes magical. Exactly. Yeah.
Tom Jackobs: 10:18
They don’t teach that in school.
Joan Nwosu: 10:19
I know, right? What do they teach in school? They don’t teach you money. They don’t teach you relationships. Geez.
Tom Jackobs: 10:25
What are we doing? Wow. So you’ve took your struggle, made it a business, and now you’re building that business up. Now, a lot of Heart Lead business owners that I speak to, they struggle with the business side and being okay with making money. Where do you stand on that?
Joan Nwosu: 10:49
I used to be that person. I used to be the one who said, I figured this out. I can help people. I just want to help people. I just want to help people. Yeah. Helping people is good, but guess what it also doesn’t do? It doesn’t pay the bills. And I think for me, the shift was when I learned that If you made more money, you could actually help more people. So you just giving it away for free thinking, Oh, I’m just people don’t even appreciate what they don’t pay for. So being able to build and grow and scale a business is very key because now not only can you reach more people, you can help more people. You can do the things that you also want to do in your life so that you’re full and complete. When you’re full and complete, you can give more. If you’re running from an empty tank good luck with that. You’re not going to get really far. So I had to come to terms with making money is not a bad thing. I want to help but I want to make money too. Just saying.
Tom Jackobs: 11:45
How did it feel like when you made that decision that it’s okay to make money now? Like where, what, where was your headspace at that point?
Joan Nwosu: 11:55
Oh, so this was after periods of being broke, like I would quit my nine to five job and go all in and then be broke again. And because I was charging low for my services because I was like, no, but who’d want to pay me? But all of the stories that I tell myself. And it wasn’t until I said, you know what, but what you’re doing is valuable. It is something of value. People pay for things that are valuable. So unless you think that what you’re given is not valuable, then you can’t make money. But if you know that it can really transform and change people’s lives, then it is of value. And as long as we’re in this 3D dimensional earth universe right now, the currency for value, the exchange, is money. And so that was such a big release for me of letting go of that whole fear of charging people, fear of success, fear of making money. I just let it go. And it was like, Oh, you know what? This is something of value. Why shouldn’t I get paid for it? But it was difficult. It took me years.
Tom Jackobs: 12:55
And that’s a very common story. And one of the premise of starting this podcast anyway, was to help people know that they’re not alone in those decisions and those thoughts that you know, I just want to help people and it’s okay to not make money and no, it’s not okay that you’re not making money. It really isn’t okay. Because if you can’t help yourself, how are you going to help anybody else? Same with love, right? You can’t love yourseld and love anybody else. You can try.
Joan-Nwosu: 13:26
If only I find someone to love me, I’ll be okay. No, you won’t. You need to love yourself first. So if you do value yourself, then you raise your prices to match the amount of value that you have in yourself. I think when people think maybe I’m like, again, it could be just be imposter syndrome, right? If you’re just starting out new and Oh, but they’re going to figure out, I don’t really know what I’m doing. They’re going to figure out I don’t have enough experience. Maybe I’m going to say the wrong thing. If I charge low, then even if I make a mistake, then they’re just going to say, Oh I only paid 7 for that. So it doesn’t matter. So these are some of the fears and challenges that people go through. And I think every entrepreneur goes through that challenge. So just know that it’s a okay right now, but you can stay stuck there. You have to keep believing in yourself keep believing in the message or the service that you’re offering and believing that you are worthy of making as much money as you want because what you’re giving to the world is of value you are helping and serving people.
Tom-Jackobs: 14:18
When I’ll have contractors
Joan-Nwosu: 14:21
that
Tom-Jackobs: 14:21
I’ll want to hire and I give them, obviously ask what the fee is and they’ll give me a fee. I’m like, Oh yeah, that’s not in my budget. And even if they say, Oh let me cut it down. Like I will not let them, I was like no, that is what your worth is. And that’s what you believe. I don’t want you to lower your price just for me, just because my budget doesn’t allow me to pay you what you’re worth. I will find somebody else that’s more in line with the budget that I have. And because what I’ve found is when even on the side of the customer, if you’re underpaying a service provider, a professional, sometimes they get a little disgruntled having to not pay you as, or not receive as much pay as you wouldn’t ordinarily, and the work isn’t that great and the relationship isn’t all that great. And so now if somebody ever says, Oh, let me cut it down. I was like, no, that’s okay. That’s Yeah.
Joan-Nwosu: 15:24
Yeah I agree. Yeah. But it’s again, it’s not easy. And they didn’t teach us business in school either. So we’re just trying to figure out and that’s where people, we have coaches out there, people like you, Tom, who can really guide people on this journey so that you know that when you’re not alone, the struggle is real. Every entrepreneur goes through that, but there are steps that you can take to make sure that you’re able to get to that point where you can charge your worth and build a thriving, successful business, as well as help people. We can do both.
Tom-Jackobs: 15:56
It’s not one or the other. You’re right. That is, that’s absolutely true. So what’s one piece of advice that you would, other than don’t quit your day job, one piece of advice that you would tell somebody that says, I want to start this Heart Lead business. I’m not quite sure about the business side. What would you tell them?
Joan-Nwosu: 16:15
Hire a coach, hire a business coach but hire a good one. I’ve had many coaches in that past. Cookie cutter, just, this is some of their processes. I don’t know. Maybe back then there was no chat GPT, but not all coaches are meant for everybody. So find a coach that is really in alignment, that understands your vision and is in alignment with what it is that you want to do. And we’re all different, right? Some of us have no problems being on social media. We can create videos easily, we can post all day, we can be on podcasts. Some people don’t. Some people just want to hide and do whatever. I don’t know what they do. Maybe just send emails or whatever it is. I’m not that person, as you can see. Extrovert here. But you need to find a coach that aligns, that understands who you are, what your values are, what your skill sets are. But again, you still have to be able to get uncomfortable because sometimes they’re just things you just have to do. It’s business until you get to a point where you can hire other people. So hire a good coach that can work with you. Do not wait for perfection to get started. Get started. It’s going to be difficult anyway. So what does it matter? You wait two years to start. It’s still going to be a difficult journey. So just start where you are. Stop trying to be perfect and just take the feedback, learn from it, learn from the right people and just keep growing. But don’t give up on that dream and do not start. Get yourself a coach and I’ll see you at the top.
Tom-Jackobs: 17:38
Yeah, that’s solid advice too. And on the coaching side of it, I always look for somebody with a specific set of skills that I do not have in terms of if I’m going to get specific coaching. And I’ve had the same business coach for 15 maybe 20 years now. Yeah. So 20, 2008, 2009, do the math on that and she’s amazing and just holds me accountable. And that’s, it didn’t start that way. It was more educational and we’ve grown in our relationship in terms of he coaching that she provides me and the value that she provides me. But it’s invaluable. If you’re a coach and you don’t have a coach, you’re a hypocrite.
Joan-Nwosu: 18:20
Need a coach for every area, to be honest, because Yeah. Accountability is so big. And like you were saying, the educational piece is great. That’s what will get you started. You dunno, business, you dunno, marketing, you dunno, sales, you dunno, whatever it is, right? You have that person that can guide you, but essentially you still need to get the work done. And that’s why having a coach where you can be accountable with who will call you out on your bs. And be like, you said you were going to do this. Why haven’t you done it? Do you want someone who can keep motivating you and keep pushing you to move forward? Because it’s so easy to just fall back and say I’ll just go sit in my corporate job and just allow them to suck my soul some more and be okay with that.
Tom-Jackobs: 19:00
Retire at 65. We come to that time in the podcast. I know sad time. But, tell us a little bit more of how people can get ahold of you and learn more about the work that you are doing.
Joan-Nwosu: 19:17
Yeah, absolutely. So the best way to learn very quickly about what it is that I do is by going to my website, which is just joannwosu.com. I think we can put a link in the show notes. So it’s joannwosu.com where you can see a little bit more about who I am, what it is that I do, the type of people that I work with and what’s what my programs look like. You can also find me on all the social media platforms. I’ve got a YouTube channel, I’ve got a podcast. I’m on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, find me anywhere. It’s always Joan Nwosu. And I’m happy to connect. Like I offer a free strategy session where we can just talk and see where you’re at. Relationship wise, love wise, and figure out what’s not working, what’s working, and give you some tips on how you can move forward with your love life. And in addition, I do have a free online dating challenge that I’m giving away to all your listeners. And this is specifically for people who, maybe you’ve tried the dating thing after divorce and it’s not working and it’s oh, I hate the dating apps. There’s nothing wrong with the dating apps. It’s how you’re using the dating apps that’s the problem. So this is a quick way to get started. It’s a seven day challenge where every day I send you information on what you need to do. Creating your profile, writing your bio, how to swipe, how to catch those red flags pretty quickly, how to have the right kind of conversations, how to go on dates and all of that good stuff. Because 2025 is the year that you find that lover. Ha!
Tom-Jackobs: 20:39
that’s awesome. How to swipe.
Joan-Nwosu: 20:44
And I don’t mean left or right. Yeah, how to swipe because you’ll be surprised, Tom.
Tom-Jackobs: 20:50
Oh, that’s great. What a great service too. And definitely needed in these these days for sure.
Joan-Nwosu: 20:56
Yeah. Yeah.
Tom-Jackobs: 20:57
So Joan, thank you again so much for being on the show. This has been just a delight. I love speaking with you every time that we do speak.
Joan-Nwosu: 21:06
It’s always a pleasure, Tom. Thank you so much for having me. And yeah, may 2025 be your best year ever.
Tom-Jackobs: 21:12
And you as well.
Joan-Nwosu: 21:14
Thank you.
Tom-Jackobs: 21:15
Thank you listeners and those that are watching on YouTube as well. Thank you so much. I do appreciate you tuning in and do make sure that you’re checking out everything that Joan is doing. We’re going to provide all of that into the show notes so that it’s just a click away and you can take that dating challenge. And find that love in 2025 if you haven’t found it yet, or find a better love, making switches is fine, but also you can do me another solid favor, and that is to give the show a rating and review that helps spread the word about what we’re talking about here in terms of heart led businesses and helping those that want to put people over profits and still make a profit doing it. So until next time, lead with your heart.
Speaker 2: 21:56
You’ve been listening to the Heart Led Business Show, hosted by Tom Jackobs. Join us next time for another inspiring journey into the heart of business.
